Tuesday, June 10, 2008

cuttin' it close

two things i want you to see here...
1) for starters...this is the most i've ever put into my little 4 banger (4 cylinder) honda accord.
2) i blogged before about how i my honda sometimes lives on the "e" line. well...here's the proof. my car has a 15 gallon tank, as you can clearly see i needed more than 15 gallons. cuttin' close....
what's the most you've spent at the pump, lately?

Monday, June 9, 2008


the baby fro just got too hot!!!
before the cut... during the cut.. after the cut...

Friday, June 6, 2008

livin' in 2008

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses .
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
You're reading this and laughing because you've done a few of these! Right?
Which one, two, or three made you laugh?

Monday, June 2, 2008

familylife conference

what an incredible weekend we just had...definitely one to remember! wifey and i, along with 6 other incredible couples, attended a weekend long marriage conference that was held in the downtown Disney area. A Weekend To Remember is hosted by FamilyLife ministries. wifey and i have lead several marriage small groups over a year now and it's off the chain!! we have couples from all walks of life who want more out of their marriages than just a roommate!! it has been an honor to see God change these marriages right in front of us.....including our own. no matter how long we've been married...we can all use a tune up and a tweak in certain areas of our life. if you ever have the opportunity to expericence A Weekend To Remember conference......then Go!

Friday, May 30, 2008

calm down

i was driving home yesterday from work. tryin' to get home as fast as possible to see the two ladies in my life! the last mile before entering our subdivision is a 35 mph zone. yesterday a car was doing about 15 mph and had several cars backed up. some decided to go around the car disregarding the double yellow lines and some honked their horns. i started to get frustrated too, but i stopped and calmed down. I DID WHAT? yeah.....i was shocked too! i thought to myself....there has to be a reason for the pokieness going on up there? it was an elderly couple that seemed to be lost.

yesterday some put their lives in danger by taking on the oncoming traffic and some got so mad that they cussed out the elderly couple. WOW! have we gotten to a place that a slow car can put us in a state of rage and have us make decisions that could cost us our life? at the end of the day it may have cost me another minute of my life to drive patiently behind the lost couple. so the next time you encounter a situation that makes your blood boil quickly. take a minute to calm down and reason the situation before you make your decision. it may cost you less than you think.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

prep time!

15 and 30 minute meals are a joke! let me tell you why and if you cook you will understand. PREP TIME! choppin' all your veggies and marinating your meats can sometimes take you 15 to 30 minutes alone. when we watch all the cooking shows on tv.... all the prep work is done. yeah....that's right, sittin' in those little containers and bowls on the counter is all the grunt work of cooking! if when i started cookin' and the prep work was sittin' in bowls. i would then be able to do 15 and 30 minute meals. don't get it twisted.... i really enjoy cooking and tryin' new things in the kitchen. but, it hit me last night when i was cooking. i thought i would whip something together real quick for wifey and me. by the time i got done with the prep......30 minutes had gone by and i hadn't put heat on anything! hmm...maybe i can get wifey to do all my prep work?

Monday, May 26, 2008

top deck

hmmm.... look at the sexy chocolate on the beach!! calm down, calm down! i'm kidding...maybe? this picture was taken on the 2nd day of the cruise on cococay, royal caribbean's island. wifey and i enjoyed our time on the boat and the bahama beaches. my favorite part of the cruise was chillin' on the top deck when we were at sea. what a view with the cool, strong breeze hittin' your face that feels like it's going to knock you down. YEAH BABY!! i gotta say though.....the cruise didn't live up to all the hype. almost everyone we told we were cruisin' said it would be the best vacation we'd ever done. don't get me wrong, it was a blessing to be able to step away for a few days to relax with my lady. some say the 7 day cruise is better, some say disney is better. who knows? so i guess next time we need to do a 7 day disney cruise. yeah right....with who's money? oh yeah.... the other thing i was trippin' out over was the size of the boat. THAT THING WAS HUGE! i would just stare at it sometimes in awe of its size. so....maybe someday i'll see you on the top deck?

Thursday, May 15, 2008

quick 5

tomorrow wifey and i are off for the cruise! we're celebrating our 5th year anniversary on the 17th. what a short ride 5 years has been for us. we've traveled the globe, moved across the country, given birth to a beautiful daughter, helped to plant a church, changed careers. wow! what will the next 5 be like? can't wait to find out what the Lord has in store.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008


how can she find so much pleasure out of something that hurts soooo bad? yeah....it looks cute, but it's not your nose/cheek/little part of the eye that's in a death grip!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

get a job

this is the pooch, bentley. weighin' in around 80 pounds, give a few. he's a good dog and listens well. i just wish he'd get a job!! he just chills way too much for what he brings to the table. that would be nothin'.....wifey says he brings us love and protection. WHAT? that's a bunch of crap!! when i come home from work, he acts if i'm interrupting his nap time or his tough schedule and then he has the nerve to get irritated. the question is....how can i make some dough from the pooch? he's too old to model and wifey took his manhood away a long time ago. any suggestions? and i know i'm not the only one that feels that his dog is too lazy and needs a job. or am i?

Monday, May 12, 2008

how many eggs?

on saturday mornings wifey or i will usually make some type of breakfast, other than smoothies or oatmeal. this past weekend we were a little tight on groceries, since we haven't made the wally world trip in a minute. i had 3 eggs and some turkey bacon to work with. no problem, i've worked with less. my plan was to just split the three eggs between the two of us. hold up, wait a minute! when i cracked the first egg, it had 2 yokes in it. dang!! i have never seen this before. The Lord has always provided for me and my family, but sometimes the Lord gets funny with His methods. I'm grateful to serve a God with a sense of humor and who doesn't forget the small things.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

cruisin' in a week

it's been a couple of years since wifey and i got away from the hustle of everyday life. our 5th year anniversary is May 17th and will be in the bahamas by way of this little sail boat. we are set and ready to cruise!! this is our 1st cruise. so we went with royal caribbean, 'cause we heard a lot of good things about the line. have you cruised? what was your likes and dislikes? i'd love to hear....

where my surfers at?

let me tell you why i need a surfer. new smyrna beach in fl is typically where the fam and i go to just chill. it's south of daytona beach, fl. every year new smyrna ranks as one of the highest shark attacks beaches in the country. there have been 11 shark bites so far this year and 10 out of the 11 have happened in the same spot. hmm...still not sure why people keep going to that same spot. NOT WHERE WE GO!! my strategy is this..... as long as there's a surfer out farther than me, it's all good. as you can see yesterday....there were no surfers or anybody in the water for that matter. i did not swim yesterday, which is a first for me. i still had a good time with my fam, but i needed a surfer to comfort me.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

beach day

i surprised wifey and my 3 month old by taking them to the beach today. i only put in work for half a day at the office. wifey 'bout flipped her mind when she found out that i took off for a day at the beach! i just needed to spend some time with my family. for me......at the end of the day my family is the most important thing i have. my career, friends, houses, cars, toys, etc. will come and go, but a good family.......hard to come by. i love the family God has given me!

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

the good toons

i don't know about you, but i miss the old school cartoons! remember back in the day when cartoons didn't talk..... and you had to use your imagination. still to day, if i have a few minutes on a saturday morning, i will search all 100+ channels trying to find a throw-back cartoon. tom and jerry is still one of my favs. what about you?

Monday, May 5, 2008

losin' my mind at wally world!!

i did the bi-weekly shopping at wally world this last saturday. i got myself pumped up, cause goin' to wally world aint no joke. ya know what i'm sayin'? so... i got my list together by walkin' all thru the house to see what we needed. stop it....you do it too! finally, after all the pre-game hype, i get to wally world and "it's time to do work." i was doin' good for the first 15 minutes or so (going off of memory) and then i went to the list. do you know i couldn't read what I HAD WRITTEN! i sat there starring, thinkin' to myself.........what is THAT! am i trippin'? you...have...got...to...be...kiddin! after 'bout 2 good hard minutes and i mean..... hard minutes of lookin' at my list... i remembered what i was tryin' to write. i'm still a little worried that i couldn't read my gibberish and that i had to go off memory. WOW!!

Friday, May 2, 2008


this show is off the chain!! it's still one of my favorite shows on tv. i actually like all 3 csi's, but rarely watch them all even with tevo. csi: ny is probably my favorite. i just can't believe csi: las vagas has been on 8 seasons. i remember watching the first episode!

Thursday, May 1, 2008

da onesie

so i'm changin' my 3 month old last night, gettin' her ready for bed, right? i'm thinkin' no more than a few minutes since i was watchin' the cavs close out the wizards in game 5 (didn't happen, cavs lost by a point.) why does it take 15 minutes to change a diaper and put a onesie on 23 inches? thank the Lord for some tevo! i guess the trick is...... gettin' her setup during halftime and not during a commercial.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

late showers

so yesterday i was running a little late to get out the door for the workspot. what is it that makes us think we have time to take a shower..... when we need to be walking out the door in 1o minutes? but, we try it anyway!! i can pull it off if i'm throwin' on some jeans, sweats, and a tee. but, mon-fri..... i'm suited up. in my head, i know i can't shower and suit up in 10 minutes, but i still try it anyway. wifey is funny too, cause she knows when i'm supposed to be leaving. she'll hear or see me turn the shower on and just shake her head. "you don't have time for that.....do you know what time it is?" i know...i know, it'll be cool. sometimes i can get real close to makin' it and what happens........i have to go to the bathroom!!! as soon as that happens....i'm officially late.

Monday, April 28, 2008

stuck on the beach

it was some nice livin' yesterday here in central florida.....mid 80's. lovely!! so i took wifey and our 3 month old to new smyrna beach....'bout a 35 minute drive from the house. the water was a little cold for wifey and baby, but it was all good for me! my girls laid on the beach, while i got layed out by the waves. we stayed at the beach 'bout.....3 hours and some change. one of the great things about this beach is that you can park your car on the beach. which is cool, cause' everything you need is right there next to you in the car. it was our first time to park our car on the beach. let me start by sayin', my honda accord with the low profile tires doesn't like going uphill in the sand. maaan..... i got stuck! 'bout 3 guys came to my rescue and helped the bogged down honda. they told me 'bout another exit that was honda friendly, which is what i will use from now on. it's funny now.....yesterday it wasn't.

Friday, April 25, 2008

ghetto flat screen

this was flat screen before there was flat screen. this is sooo.....ghetto! again, if this is your tv......my bad.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

where's bentley?

wifey and i have a really cool dog named bentley. he's half pit/half rott and well trained. i know, i know...... you don't believe me and that's cool, because you don't have to. but this story is funny! two nights ago at about...... 1:20 am i hear 3 short barks from bentley. i thought to myself, who's outside my house because "B" only barks when he's told to or if someone is near that's not welcome. so i get up to look outside and who do i see? it's bentley!! he had been outside on the patio waiting contently to be let back in from his poop/pee break that begin at 11:15 pm. this may not be a big deal at your home, but we don't have a fence! which means our 90 pound pitt/rottie didn't leave the yard and stayed outside faithfully for over 3 hours. how could you forget this handsome dog you ask? wifey forgot to let him back in.... which is great for me, 'cause bentley and i haven't always been on the same page. but we tight now! thanks wifey!

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

back to the job

i went back to work Monday from being off a whole week and of course i wasn't ready to go back. my reality set in when the alarm went off. in my mind i tried to figure out how i could just get one more day off and promised myself i would rest. that really doesn't work! so, then i convinced myself that when i got home from work, i would go straight to bed. that never happens either, but it seems to help me get moving for the moment. i've been back at work for a couple of days and getting back in the groove. my question to you: why is going back to work after vacation so hard? i feel it's one of the most unholy things to do....of course that's when the alarm is blaring that first morning of return!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

fair warning

when i worked in an all sales office, we had a lot of down time. so, some of the guys liked to pull pranks on each other. all i asked is that they didn't pull one on me! my revenge wouldn't be so funny. they held off for a long time without pranking me, until one day..... they got me. they filled my leather chair with water, when i sat down to answer the phone my butt got soaked. needless to say....i gave everyone fair warning to leave me alone. so.....the brave one stepped up and confessed that he did the prank and for me to bring it on. SO I DID! did i mentioned i lived in Colorado Springs and he commuted to Denver everyday?......about an hour drive and it was winter? i waited a few days to let the anticipation die down. i went to taco bell and grabbed about 10 hot sauce packets. i poured the sauce along the top of his windshield wipers. so, when he'd turn on his wipers, the sauce would smear the windshield, blinding his vision. IT WORKED!! i received a VERY COLORFUL phone call about 30 minutes into his commute that he couldn't see out of his windshield and he was pulling off the highway to try to scrap the sauce off his windshield!! did i mention it was snowing? imagine..... the mixture of taco bell sauce, windshield wiper fluid, snow, and freezing temperatures, i would say that made up for the soaking of my leather chair.

Monday, April 21, 2008

driving fast?

this is a true sign that you're driving way to fast! if you got pulled over by a cop, there's not an excuse in the world that could get you out of a speeding ticket.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

gasin' with no apoligies

my 11 week old baby girl can do no wrong at this stage in her life. everything she does, everybody thinks it's so cute! let me prove it. last week she farted (in my lap) so loud in church, people heard it on the other side of the room. i think she planned the whole thing. her timing was too perfect, cause she did it right when the pastor paused to take a breath. and it wasn't a quick hitter, she went for a good strong 3 seconds. of course she smiled and giggled, knowing papa would take the initial hit of blame. everyone for a second thought it was me......but i was innocent on this occasion! if you or i did that anywhere near church (maybe some of you do) we wouldn't be so cute!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

word of the day is.......


cuz.....u trippin' right now, but omelette you slide.


Tuesday, March 25, 2008

fightin' over yo' mama

remember back in the day.....you'd be on the playground at recess playin' kickball, tetherball, or wall ball. and someone would get mad cause they got beat, the next thang you hear is......YO MAMA! awwww, no he didn't......everybody circled around you two cause it's bout' to go down right here right now! for y'all that don't know.....when yo momma is put in ANY sentence, a fight bout' to break out! before we started fightin, remember we would go round and round in circles for minutes (it seemed) until the first punch was thrown and it would go to the ground, then the teacher showed up. i had so much fun as a kid!!!

here's a few throwback momma jokes we was fightin' over:
1) yo momma so fat, she had to iron her clothes on the driveway!
2) yo momma so black, the teacher marked her absent at night school!
3) yo momma so fat, she wore a vcr as a beeper! classic
4) yo momma so black, if she put on orange lipstick....she look like a cheeseburger!
comment if you got one or two.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

prime property!!

what in the world!!! yeah.....that's what i thought too. so, the next time you start to trip about where you live. calm down, cause you could be on the 4th floor in this fine establishement! and if you are......my bad.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

i did it again

back in the day i drank alot coke, soda, pop, whatever you want to call depending on where you reside. i never kept them in frig, cause they took up so much room. i'm not an ice man either.... so what do i do.......when i get in from doing my thang, i will put a coke in the freezer and in no time it's nice and cold! my problem has always been, I FORGET that i put that coke in the freezer. so hours later i'm sitting, watchin' the game, forgotten all about the coke that's about to blow up my freezer and BOOM!!! .....what was that? then it hits me.... it's my can!! sometimes i dont even hear the blow up.....it will hit me in mid sleep, you know how you just wake up in the middle of the night....like from a crazy dream. crap.....the can! not much you can at that point, the damage is done, your freezer looks like a coke can blew up inside! so you clean it in the morning. needless to say it's been almost a year since i've blown up my freezer......well until two days ago. we had a party at our crib on saturday, there were a few cokes left. so when i came home on monday from work, i thought.....i want a coke, it's been a while. you already know what i did! yeah....i put it in the freezer and didn't realize it til' the next morning while making coffee. WOW!! i tried to convince my wife to help a brotha out.... you already know how that went down! all she said is.....PUH-LEEEASE!!!

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

gas is whaaaaat!!

check this out.... you know gas is too high when you can't afford to mow your lawn! remember when you could fill up that little 3 gallon gas can for a couple of bucks!! i don't even fill that up any more, i stop at five bucks. i cant put no $10 dollars in that little thing! on the flip side... i've been so low on gas in my car.......that i used the gas from that little can the garage! see..... i live and drive on the "E" line, it drives my wife crazy. if she gets in my car after me, she'll come back in the house to ask me if she can make it to the store and back? you already know what i'm going to say! yeah, you can make it back!! she always makes it back.... probably not without praying a little bit, though.

Monday, March 17, 2008


my six week old daughter had her first poopexplosion last week. to all parents new or old, you know what i'm talking about! that poop you smell before it hits the diaper, that fart you hear over the tv or radio and you say to yourself......"what was that"? yeah, you know what it is, you look to your spouse or anybody for that matter to see who you can sucker into changing that bomb that just dropped. it's amazing how quick you get your six week old back, when seconds ago she was the cutest thing since beanie babies. so you're left alone to do the deed.......you could get mad, but why, she didn't do it to you on purpose...... or did she?